Attitude is Everything

Why are some of us optimists and some not?  I think we're at least partially hardwired--just like we’re predisposed to much of our temperament--it's our default mode.  After that, the positive or negative environment we grow up in is an influence, along with all our experiences along the way.  

Optimists give most people the benefit of the doubt and see the world through the rosy glow of hope.  They're confident about the future and believe good will prevail over evil.  Although it may be our usual way of looking at the world, most of us don't want to be naive.  Finding ourselves in a situation with a bit of apprehension or uneasiness, optimists often indulge in a healthy dose of skepticism--being deliberately cautious and questioning.  It's acknowledging that human nature at its base level is motivated by self-interest, and not being blind to the possibility of being let down.  A more accurate word for the skeptical optimist might be a realist.

Pessimists are defeatists who automatically believe everything will go wrong.  This negative state of mind can often be attributed to past experiences and the fear, anxiety or depression they brought on.  The responses we have to our successes and failures form a pattern of thinking that becomes engrained and dictates how we view our prospects and the world around us.  And chronic pessimists are diehard cynics.  Cynicism is being suspicious of human sincerity and integrity and having a basic distrust of the world.  The cause of some cynicism is projection.  Most people see the world (and the people in it) as a reflection of themselves--assuming everyone has the same traits that they possess.  They project their own behavior onto others.  If a person believes that everyone is innately good, sincere and honest--it's probably because they are also that.  But if someone believes everyone is deceptive, dishonest and is out to get them--it's often because they themselves are that way.  

Both optimists and pessimists tend to self-fulfill their expectations in life.  They say if we're inclined toward optimism, we'll be more persistent in chasing your goals, with the likeliness of more successes in life.  Optimists will tell themselves that disappointments are learning experiences.  Being an optimist can also have a positive impact on our health.  But if we’re pessimistic, we’ll feel defeated before we begin, will put in less effort, accept setbacks as inevitable, and likely give up easily. 

Can a negative attitude be changed?  It takes overcoming whatever brought us to this mindset.  We need to reframe the stories we tell ourselves about how life has treated us.  It takes determination to refuse to let the past predict our future.  Fate and karma are not our friends--life is not out of our control.  

Look for balance.  We need to set our compasses to the positive and put blinders on for a lot of the negative.  With the bleak news that bombards us daily, we need to distract ourselves by seeking out reassuring news and upbeat stories to focus on.  If the bad news is hard to escape, remember, a little bit goes a long way.  Don’t spend hour after hour and day after day ingesting worse and worse news.  That can pull even the most fervent optimist into despair. 

Upbeat people are worth seeking out.  Nothing will drag a person down faster than spending time with pessimists.  We need to surround ourselves with positive, cheerful, constructive people!  Optimism can rub off.

And finally, look around for things to be grateful for—families, health, the outdoors, etc.  This will restore and reinforce hope and positive thinking.  There is always some good to be found.

Our belief system dictates whether we're inclined toward optimism or pessimism.  But not everyone who is not optimistic is pessimistic and visa-versa.  And it's not a static viewpoint--most of us will waver in our state of mind at times in our lives.  It's a fuzzy line between viewing the glass as half-full or half-empty.