I Won the Lottery
I've had an extremely happy, healthy and comfortable life. The one tragedy was my brother passing away from cancer before he turned 50. And my personal low was ending my marriage--but even that had an upside. Otherwise, it's all been good. So what are the chances I'd win the lottery in life?
What are the odds my father would turn 100! Or as I think of it--what are the odds I'd still have my dad in my life at 73 years old! (And my mom until I was 70!)
As we all know, being 100 can have significant variables. But my dad is still living alone in their home, with good health, and with his mind as sharp as ever. He obviously has good genes--but I believe it's more than that. He's always believed in working hard and playing hard--he built businesses and loved his sports. And he knows the key is keeping your mind active, stimulated and challenged--which he's always done by reading and study.
Anyone who knows me, knows I refer to my father more than most adults do. I repeat what he thinks about things, the advice he's given me, and I tend to mention him in casual conversation. I can't recall if this was always the case, but after I got divorced, my relationship with my parents took more prominence in my life. They, with Jaime, made up my family.
We were a family who skied. As much as I hated those early mornings getting up in the dark and driving over an hour, then hauling our (then much longer) skies, etc., it was something we did together, had in common, that got us outdoors. My brother, Steve, and I grew to love it. It was a great gift.
One of the highlights of my post-divorce years, was an annual trip I took with my parents to New York city for "Asia Week." We all loved and collected Japanese antiques. It was just the three of us going from showroom to showroom and then a nice dinner where we'd rehash the day. It was a wonderful time of togetherness that we shared for five years and I have great memories of it.
As we all got older, I visited my parents more often--first from California, then driving from Portland to Seattle. My mom and I would talk all day and sometimes go out antiquing or to a nursery. Then my dad would join us to go out to dinner or we'd stay home for cocktail hour, dinner and to watch a movie. When my mom got ill, I still tried to engage with her. But my dad and I had increasingly more conversations, mostly concerning her health. After she died, it was just me and my dad.
I still go up to visit about once a month, and now my dad and I talk. We've developed a relationship that we didn't have when it was the three of us. As corny as it may sound, we've bonded in a way we hadn't before--as more than just father and daughter. Along with news and politics (fortunately we agree), we discuss our lives and life in general. The man who I'd always looked up to as my father, is now also my friend.
That's why I feel so lucky--like I won the lottery. I still have my remarkable father, and he adds a richness to my life that I'm forever thankful for.
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